


Nothing Hurts When You’re With Me

by ap_marvel



Series: I Lost Myself But I Remember You [1]
Category: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse), Resident Evil - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, flirty carlos, i love them so fucking much, jill ain't having it until she wants it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:41:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24235954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ap_marvel/pseuds/ap_marvel
Summary: “I – I think I’d want to settle down somewhere quiet, with someone special.”Jill tried to keep up a smile, even though her heart sat at the bottom of her stomach, sinking into something like loneliness. “I didn’t pick you for the white picket fence type,” she joked lightly.“I didn’t either but,” His expression became serious as he looked at her, his fingers delicately brushing the hair from her face before he brushed them against her cheek. “You meet people and things change.”
Relationships: Carlos Oliveira/Jill Valentine
Series: I Lost Myself But I Remember You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1758760
Comments: 16
Kudos: 90





	Nothing Hurts When You’re With Me

**Author's Note:**

> I tried my best to give Jill some trauma because lord knows this girl has been through some shit and i love writing male characters as big softies so get ready for some fluff y'all. 
> 
> (shameless plug: follow me on the bird app @ap__marvel)

“find someone who makes you realize three things: one, home is not a place, it’s a feeling. two, time is not measured by clocks, but by moments. and three, heartbeats are not heard, but felt and shared.” – _Unknown_

***

Jill sat with one knee propped up on the seat of the chair, her head leaning against the pane of the window. It was raining heavily, the sound of it rattling against the glass and pattering against the concrete outside. Her temple was cold against it as she watched water droplets trail down, her mind wandering.

It took her mind away from the pain, the new reality she faced and certainly the faces of the people that had died. Brad. Mikhail. Tyrell. People that she had killed. And, God… Carlos. She couldn’t stop thinking about her finger on the trigger, the decision she had to make, and if it had been fatal. No – she shouldn’t think about that. He survived. And he never spoke of Raccoon City, just like she hadn’t. Because it was her home and they had destroyed it. Robbed it and its people. Robbed her. But she never stopped thinking about it… Never stopped carrying the guilt.

“Jill?” A voice called softly and yet the sound of it was gruff, like he had just woken.

She turned her attention from the rain to see him sitting up on his bed, his t-shirt creased from sleep, rubbing his eye. She gave him an apologetic look, knowing he didn’t like sleeping with the light on. “Sorry,” she croaked before clearing her throat. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Nah, don’t sweat it.” He waved off as he got up, running a hand through his curls. He picked up his watch, his eyes widening when he saw the time and he turned to her worriedly. “Jesus, Jill. How long have you been up?”

She shook her head, turning away to watch another drop of rain trail down the window. “I couldn’t sleep.”

He walked towards her, placing a warm gentle had on her shoulder. “Even Supercops need rest, you know.”

“Yeah…” Jill attempted a smile and placed a hand over his, her head slightly leaning on his arm. “I’ll try.”

He nodded, somewhat satisfied with her answer. “Well, I’m gonna go hit the shower.” His hand slipped from her shoulder as he began to walk in the direction of the bathroom, he turned to look at her over his shoulder with a smirk. “You’re more than free to join.”

She rolled her eyes, reaching over to grab the pen sitting on the coffee table and hitting him squarely on the head. He rubbed the back of his head, the deep rumble of his laughter warming the cold of the motel room. And she’d be lying if she said she didn’t have a smile on her face as she stared out the window.

The rain had stopped.

***

Jill stood in front of the steamed-up mirror, wiping away the condensation to see her reflection. The bruises on her arm and across her ribs were prominent, splashes of purple and blue and the feathered edges began to yellow. She sighed and put on the clothes Carlos had bought her, almost fitting perfectly. He had a good eye. She fumbled with the sleeves of her shirt. It wasn’t as comfortable as the sleeveless shirts and tank tops she used to wear. But at least the bruises were gone. She slowly ran a comb through her short damp hair before leaving the bathroom.

She took a double take as she saw Carlos singing along to a song she didn’t recognise on the radio. He even swayed in time with the beat as he stood over his bed, cleaning his gear.

She leaned against the doorway with a small smile as she watched him. His excitement as he sang the chorus buzzed in the air and she was surprised that he was able to hit the high notes and the low notes so well. She watched amusedly as he held his comms like a mic and started to dance, turning around.

Jill expected him to freeze at the sight of her, maybe hear his voice catch in his throat as he would stare at her embarrassedly. Instead he grinned like a sly fox, set his ‘mic’ down and walked towards her, extending a graceful hand. His singing become softer… Sweeter.

The smile dropped from her face, her cheeks heating. “No.”

He continued to sing softly, extending his hand further towards her.

“Carlos...”

His warm brown eyes stared at her gently. “Come on Jill. It’s just a dance.”

Her mouth felt dry as she swallowed. She held his gaze for a moment, trying to put up a fight. But she already knew that she couldn’t win, not when her heart was pounding beneath her chest at the sight of him.

She placed her hand in his and he gently tugged her towards him, close enough to smell his aftershave. Her fingers interlocked behind his neck, his damp curls brushing against them as his arms wrapped around her waist, light enough that she could barely feel them. She felt herself biting her lip as they slowly swayed to the song, their gaze locked as he murmured the words to her. She laid her head lightly against his shoulder, closing her eyes as she listened to his chest rumble with his voice. They stayed like that for a while, enjoying the rare moment of intimacy they had since escaping the city.

The song came to an end.

“Jill?”

“Hmm?”

“What are you gonna do, once this is all over? When Umbrella is over?” She furrowed her brows at his question, lifting her head off of his shoulder to look at him. He shook his head and started to step away from her. “Sorry. It’s none of my business.”

As soon as distance settled between them, the comfort she had felt began to dissipate. She placed a hand on his retreating arm, stopping him from moving away any further. “No, it’s okay.” Her other hand rested on his chest and she stared at it. “I just… I hadn’t thought about it.” She looked up at him. “Have you?”

He seemed a little lost for words, though Jill was unsure why. In fact, he became slightly flushed, tearing his gaze away from her as he answered. “I – I think I’d want to settle down somewhere quiet, with someone special.”

Jill tried to keep up a smile, even though her heart sat at the bottom of her stomach, sinking into something like loneliness. “I didn’t pick you for the white picket fence type,” she joked lightly.

“I didn’t either but,” His expression became serious as he looked at her, his fingers delicately brushing the hair from her face before he brushed them against her cheek. “You meet people and things change.”

She blinked at him, his words sinking into her. She could feel her heart thundering in her ears.

He looked at her worriedly. “You still here, Supercop?”

Jill leaned forward, capturing his lips heatedly. She felt him freeze, taken off-guard by her actions momentarily before he responded. His arm wound around her waist, tugging her closer gently as his other hand threaded through her short, damp hair. Her hand was still over his chest, feeling the hurried thump of his heart as they kissed. Carlos grazed her cheek with his thumb, slowing the kiss to something so utterly blissful before they reluctantly parted for breath.

There was a long silence.

“Do you really want this?” She whispered. He tilted his head at her confusedly. “I… I’m not the same person I was in Raccoon City.”

“Good thing I didn’t know that Jill very well.”

“I’m trying to say I don’t think I’m ready to be the person you want me to be.”

“I don’t want you to be anything, Jill,” he said softly. “I just want you.”

“Why?” She asked tearfully. She tried to hold back her emotions but they only heightened as she spoke, “I’m the reason why Mikhail is dead, why Tyrell is dead. All those survivors on the train…”

“Jill, that’s not your fault.” He brushed her tears away. “It was _never_ your fault.”

She shook her head. “But it was after me, and they died because of that.”

“You can’t keep carrying all this guilt like it’s a punishment. Umbrella made the virus; Umbrella sent that monster after you. _They_ killed all those people in Raccoon City,” he said heatedly. He paused to take a breath before he said gently. “Not you.”

She bit back her tears and nodded, feeling something like relief wash over her. She hadn’t let go entirely, but enough that the weight didn’t burden as much as it before. Carlos had helped her realize that.

“Okay,” she whispered.

He smiled consolingly, pulling her into a warm embrace. His lips on the shell of her ear. “Okay.”

White picket fences had never appealed to her before, but she supposed he was right. Meeting people changed that. And nothing sounded more comforting than the idea of being with him when it was all over. If it would be over.

Another song started on the radio and she couldn’t help a teary smile as they started to slow dance. And she knew she didn’t want to stop, so they didn’t.


End file.
